Every new parent has heard a plethora of advice about baby’s sleep, and some of it is just downright silly. Let’s take a look at 5 common myths about baby’s sleep and set the record straight.
4 years ago, when I was pregnant with my first baby, I had no clue about baby sleep. I read so many books with so much conflicting advice that it was hard to know what to do. I had many conversations with well-meaning relatives that seemed to enjoy telling me how hard my life was going to be because “didn’t you know everything about babies!?”. They would spout off these different myths about baby’s sleep. Then you had the mom groups full of differing opinions with moms wanting to be right at all costs. It was hard to differentiate myth from truth.
Fast forward to now. I have 2 children and have become a pediatric sleep consultant with many many hours of training and research under my belt. I want to take some time to debunk some old age myths about baby’s sleep.
Too much sleep during the day will keep the baby up all night.
What most people do not know is that sleep begets sleep. So, limiting the amount of daytime sleep in an attempt to have baby sleep better overnight can have a negative impact on overnight sleep. Having good consistent naps during the day will prevent your baby from becoming overtired and will allow them to sleep better overnight. Having an overtired child from lack of naps will ultimately leave you with an overstimulated and exhausted baby that will not sleep well overnight. Many think that an exhausted baby will sleep better and for longer, but that is just not true! An overtired baby has an increased level of cortisol that makes them hard to settle. Make sure you follow age-appropriate wake times.
Putting your child to bed late will help them sleep in longer in the morning
This one is probably my favorite because I hear it so often. There is a quote flowing around the internet that sums up this myth perfectly “A child put to bed late will wake early and a child put to bed early will wake up late.” When a child is kept up past their wake time, they become overtired and will have increased night waking and will wake up either early or at the same time they usually wake. Having a consistent bedtime that is early enough to avoid overtiredness will help the children sleep in later. It is also important that we put kids to bed early enough, so they don’t miss out on the important non-REM sleep that takes place in the early portion of the night.
Sleeping is a natural skill and doesn’t need to be taught.
Sleep is a natural thing we are all born being able to sleep. It’s how we fall asleep that can be taught. We can’t teach a baby to be drowsy, but we can help them find ways to fall asleep without depending on external sources to sleep. No one sleeps through the night. All humans wake 2-5 times a night between sleep cycles, but as adults we go back to sleep by ourselves. Babies on the other hand, who rely on an external prop, wake up and need help to go back to sleep. If we help the baby learn to fall asleep independently, then parents can start to experience the magic of their baby sleeping through the night. With my first child, we did everything to get him to sleep, used a lot of props because we were so in need of sleep. Eventually, using these props led to less sleep. We knew right then we needed a change. At 8 months, we helped him learn independent sleep strategies and now 4 years later he is still sleeping well overnight. With my second child, we helped her develop independent sleep strategies from the very beginning and 2 years later she is still a rockstar sleeper.
It’s best to follow your baby’s own biological sleep schedule.
We, as parents, are here to help our children thrive. Good quality sleep is a need and not a luxury. If you were to leave your child to follow their own sleep schedule you would have an extremely overtired child. I am by no means saying you must have a strict routine in place. You definitely need to follow your child’s sleepy cues as well as their particular sleep needs, but if you choose to follow your child’s lead when it comes to sleep you will likely have a cranky child who is in need of some guidance on how to sleep better. For example, if a child wants to follow their own diet it’s likely to be filled with sugary drinks and candy and that’s not exactly what is best for them so we as the parents have to teach our children what is best for their bodies in the beginning with healthy and quality sleep.
Sleep training is harmful for the baby and will lead to attachment issues.
I have heard this one so many times there have been many research studies done that disprove this idea. The book Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child by Marc Weissbluth, M.D. His book is filled with research-based information that disproves any link to sleep training and attachment issues.
It is also very important to note that there is a lot of confusion between attachment parenting which is a style of parenting and the scientific notion of attachment theory. Attachment parenting is a concept created by Doctors William and Martha Sears. This type of parenting encourages always keeping the baby close to you, baby-wearing, bed-sharing, and breastfeeding on demand. Attachment theory is a psychological, evolutionary, and ethological theory concerning relationships between people. At the root of this theory is that a child needs to form a relationship with at least one primary caregiver for normal social and emotional development. Which you are able to do while also helping your child learn independent sleep strategies.
I hope I was able to dispel some common sleep myths. Have you heard any of these myths or any others like it? Share them below in the comment section!
Kattie is a certified pediatric sleep consultant with a background in early childhood education. She has a passion for educating others on infant-toddler development. As a mother of 2.5, she understands the struggles some parents face with understanding sleep patterns and healthy sleep habits. It is Kattie’s mission to help aid in the struggle all moms face: sleep!
