Can you believe it’s already February? Another pandemic year as flown by and now that most of us have fully recovered from the chaos of the holidays and the return to school for the kids, the majority of us have likely fallen back to our regular routines. And those well intended New Year’s goals that you set for yourself last month? Well, let’s just say they have already been forsaken to the daily chaos of what we call mom life.
I’m no stranger to this and if you find yourself in a similar pattern, then listen up. Did you know that you can apply the principles of Applied Behavioural Analysis to help you set, stick-to and achieve your goals?
Follow me as I share some tips on how you can make this the year you finally achieve those goals.
1. Make your goals clear and specific
My Starbucks order: Extra hot, Venti oat milk caramel mocha latte, with 2 pumps of vanilla, a splash of soy, foam whipped cream and light chocolate drizzle.
A drink order doesn’t get any more specific than that! Make sure you set your goals the same way – clearly defined and specific. We call this setting an operational definition of the behaviours needed to achieve your specific goal. An operational definition describes behaviours so that they are observable and measurable. It avoids assumptions so that anyone who reads them can identify exactly if the behaviour is occurring or not.
Why is this important?
For example, if your goal is to, “to go to bed earlier” – will you be satisfied if you go to bed at 1am if your usual time is 2am? If your goal is to “get fit” – will you have met your goal if you lose 5 lbs or perhaps when you complete a marathon? If your goal is to “eat healthier” – does having salad every night for dinner satisfy your goal?
When you set goals that are too vague, you will inevitably find yourself in trouble of abandoning them all together. Let’s rewrite the 3 goals I mentioned previously in a way that is clearly defined, observable and measurable.
- “Go to bed earlier”: For the month of February, I must be lying in bed with the lights turned out by 12am, at least 4 out of 7 nights of the week. I may or may not be asleep by this time but must be lying in bed and prepared to rest for the remainder of the night.
- “Get fit”: For the month of February I will engage in physical activity that increases my heart rate to 120 bpm for at least 30 minutes, 3 times per week.
Notice here that it is important to target measurable behaviours rather than results. The issue with targeting results is that we could be engaging in appropriate behaviours (like exercising) but still not see the outcome that we’d like (weight loss, for example) and that often leads to giving up prematurely on our goal because our effort is not met with the desired outcome.
- “Eat healthier”: For the months of February, March and April, I will consume at least 6 cups of water on a daily basis. Water must be consumed within 24 hours from the time of wake up. Juice, tea, coffee, smoothies or any other liquids of this nature are not included as part of the 6 cup minimum. Sparkling water or flavoured water (enhanced naturally or artificially) can be included as part of the 6 cups.
In this particular operational definition, notice I included examples of what counts and what does not count in terms of water consumption. Setting examples and non-examples is helpful for reducing confusion and subjectivity.
“Target measurable behaviours rather than results.”
2. Be visual, put it in your calendar and check it off
Behaviour analysts have an all encompassing love relationship with data taking. We love taking data! The information we derive from the data we collect is what drives our decision making and shapes the changes we make when coaching behaviour change. This is one aspect that separates the practice of ABA from many other professional practices.
Why bother with data taking?
Taking data ensures objectivity and provides information about progress. It serves as an objective way to let us know if what we are doing is actually working, not whether we think it’s working. Without concrete data, we may find ourselves making excuses and finding creative ways to convince ourselves that we are getting closer to reaching our goals when in reality, we aren’t.
Taking data doesn’t have to be complicated. Depending on your goal, a simple daily check of ‘yes’ or ‘no’ might suffice, a monthly calendar charting time and duration could work, or a weekly planner tallying number of occurrences might serve you well. And if you’re feeling adventurous maybe throw in a graph for a cool visual (says the behaviour nerd in me). Having that additional visual can be encouraging and helps provide feedback that’s easy for you to quickly assess. As the saying goes, seeing is believing.
3. Break it down into steps
The Great Wall started with a single brick. Break down larger goals into smaller steps. In ABA, this process is called Shaping – breaking down a target behaviour into smaller, more manageable steps. By doing so, we get successively closer to the behaviour we are looking for to reach our goals.
Let’s take our “Get Fit” goal for example. Goal: For the month of February, I will engage in physical activity that increases my heart rate to 120 bpm for at least 30 minutes, 3 times per week. If 30 minutes sounds daunting but you know this is eventually where you want to get to, you might start with the goal of 10 minutes. You can then set a criterion of how you will increase your time. For example, you can set to increase your duration by 5 minutes after each successful workout session.
4. Know when to hold’em, know when to fold’em.
Make adjustments, if necessary. Sometimes the goals we set for ourselves, though well intended, just aren’t realistic. That’s okay! It’s fine to set big goals for ourselves but be prepared to make adjustments if you find that your data is showing that you need to scale back a bit. The same can be said for adjusting your goals bigger and bolder, if you find that you need more of a challenge.
5. A win is a win, no matter how small!
Ensure you celebrate the small wins. This is so important. One thing I’ve learned as a behaviour analyst and working with young children and their families is to always celebrate the small wins. Everyone’s journeys will start at different places but the struggle to move forward is very real, so when gains are made it’s important we celebrate them! As you break down your goal into smaller steps, ensure that you provide yourself with reinforcement at the completion of each of those steps. This will help to keep motivation high and provide you with the encouragement to keep going, particularly with long term goals.
6. Find a way to stay accountable
Tell a friend or a significant other. Sometimes we may have goals that we keep to ourselves but the danger with that is that it is too easy to let things slide if we get sidetracked. So, if you’re worried about your ability to hold yourself accountable, tell someone! Choose one confidant and let them be the one to check in with you periodically to ensure accountability. We weren’t meant to travel life alone and sometimes it takes a bit of support from others to get to where we want to go.
Yvonne is a board certified behavior analyst who has over 15 years of experience in the field of ABA and disability support and advising. She’s a busy mom of two little rugrats who never fail to keep her on her toes. Her passions include food/cooking, traveling, gardening, motherhood and all things related to child development. Follow her on Instagram @everydaypracticalmama.
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